Live in the Moment

With this pregnancy I have found myself doing alot more sitting than I'm used to and alot more living in the moment, although not intentionally. I really am ashamed at how many moments I have missed throughout the years because I've refused to allow myself to just sit and soak in the moments.  We live in a culture where we are praised for being overly busy. We call this being productive- a real go-getter.  I call this missing out on life.  In the time I have allowed myself to just sit and be available to my children I have become so much closer to each of my children.  I have read more books, sung more nursery rhymes, answered deep questions about God,  listened to fears of not being the only boy anymore in about 2 months, made up stories about bunnies and ponies while my 3 year old and I sat and cuddled on the couch.  I've always known that my children are blessings, but over the last few weeks I have really come to see how fleeting these childhood days truly are.  And it makes me sad how we as mothers try to rush through the different stages of life looking for better days, not realizing that these are the better days.  Each stage of life is a precious stage.  One day before we know it our house will be quiet and clean and we will look back on these days wishing that we would have enjoyed the moments more.  Soak in the laughter of your children, the smell of a freshly bathed baby, the army of children piled in your bed because of a thunderstorm, the endless questions about frogs, indians, and fossils.
Take it all  in and live in the moment. 

Live today. Not yesterday. Not tomorrow. Just today. Inhabit your moments. Don’t rent them out to tomorrow. Do you know what you’re doing when you spend a moment wondering how things are going to turn out? You’re cheating yourself out of today. Today is calling to you, trying to get your attention, but you’re stuck on tomorrow, and today trickles away like water down a drain. You wake up the next morning and that today you wasted is gone forever. It’s now yesterday. Some of those moments may have had wonderful things in store for you , but now you’ll never know.”
 Jerry Spinelli (not sure who this is, but loved the quote)

Behold, You have made my days as handbreadths, And my lifetime as nothing in Your sight; Surely every man at his best is a mere breath. Selah.
Psalm 39:5

Simplify

This article posted over at Raising Homemakers.
Simplify.
We've all heard the phrase "less is more", and I'm learning how true that phrase really is the more I simplify our home. Over the past year we have downgraded our cable to the most basic package (just for the news and weather), sold the Wii, and have cleaned out everything we don't use, have outgrown, and dont really need. Our children now have more books than toys and are much more happier. I have found that my children are less overwhelmed and alot more creative than ever since we've simplified. My daughter has been writing songs, poems, drawing more pictures, and even reading books (she's always hated reading). My son has been spending more time outside exploring and learning the different types of birds by observing their feathers. I no longer hear the phrase "I'm bored", now that we got rid of all the video games and most of the toys. My daughter actually works on her homeschooling for FUN! Simplifying our home has also made it alot easier to keep up with the house. Less stuff= less cleaning. I truly believe that God blesses us so we can be a blessing to others. There is no greater feeling than to be able to give our over abundance of things to someone who needs it. I think of the following verses when I think of simplifying-

Luke 12:15-21
15 And He said to them, “Take heed and beware of covetousness, for one’s life does not consist in the abundance of the things he possesses.” 16 Then He spoke a parable to them, saying: “The ground of a certain rich man yielded plentifully. 17 And he thought within himself, saying, ‘What shall I do, since I have no room to store my crops?’ 18 So he said, ‘I will do this: I will pull down my barns and build greater, and there I will store all my crops and my goods. 19 And I will say to my soul, “Soul, you have many goods laid up for many years; take your ease; eat, drink, and be merry.”’ 20 But God said to him, ‘Fool! This night your soul will be required of you; then whose will those things be which you have provided?’
21 “So is he who lays up treasure for himself, and is not rich toward God.”

Notice verse 18, I will build BIGGER barns....
Isn't that what we do? We build BIGGER houses so we can store all of our stuff. Our treasure is not here, but in Heaven.

In America we work 2 jobs, longer hours, just so we can have more things. We sacrifice our health, our families, our time, our very life for things. We dont even have the time to be able to even enjoy the stuff we're working for! What if we could be satisfied with what we already have? What if we chose to have grateful hearts instead of greedy hearts?

I challenge you to think of all the ways you can simplify. A less busy schedule, less stuff, less t.v. time, less computer time, and then spend more time with God and your family.
Let's learn to be content with what we have. (Hebrews 13:5)

I'll end with a few good quotes I found on simplifying-

Frugality is one of the most beautiful and joyful words in the English language, and yet one that we are culturally cut off from understanding and enjoying. The consumption society has made us feel that happiness lies in having things, and has failed to teach us the happiness of not having things. ~Elise Boulding

Have nothing in your houses that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful. ~William Morris

The best things in life are nearest: Breath in your nostrils, light in your eyes, flowers at your feet, duties at your hand, the path of right just before you. Then do not grasp at the stars, but do life's plain, common work as it comes, certain that daily duties and daily bread are the sweetest things in life.
~Robert Louis Stevenson

Cultivating Relationships

This post is shared over at A Wise Woman Builds Her Home.
If someone asked us what's most important to us we would probably answer RELATIONSHIPS- our relationship with the Lord, our children, our husband, friends, and family. If we truly believed relationships are so important to us then why is it that we spend so little time cultivating them? It's not hard for us to spend time on the internet, keeping an orderly home, watching t.v, playing sports, or serving our family in the mundane tasks of motherhood, but when it comes to spending QUALITY time with those we love best we usually fall short. Most families never have time to develop relationships because they are over-commited to sports, music lessons, ministry opportunities, entertainment,and every other activity that comes their way. We need to simplify our schedules and weed out anything that hinders us from spending quality time with the Lord and our families. Even good things can be bad for us in particular seasons of our life. We need to be intentional with our time and use our time to invest in what matters most- relationships.

Ways to Cultivate Relationships Within the Family:

1. Eat at least one meal together as a family.
2. Make time to really LISTEN to your children.
How often do you sit and actually make eye contact with your children- laying aside all other distractions? Your children will not share their hearts with you if they feel they dont have your undivided attention.
3. Make family devotions a priority.
Start small. Set aside a few days a week for family devotions until you work up to everyday. Spending even 15-20 minutes a day reading scripture, praying as a family, singing hymns will change your family. When we first started doing family devotions it feel awkward, but over time it feels awkward if we miss a night of devotions. Most people do devotions over the supper table or before bedtime. Do what works best for your own family. There are days that life is crazy and we skip our devotions. We are still a work in progress in this.
4. Turn off the t.v., cell phones, and internet.
Trust me, you can do it! *wink*
5. Make "date" nights.
Not only with your spouse, but with each child. Once a month write a day on the calendar to spend a few hours individually with each child doing something they choose to do. Go out for icecream, take a walk, play a game, be CREATIVE!

Cultivating relationships is hard work, but always worth it!

Making Time For What Really Matters

I find that it’s hard for me to sit and enjoy life with my children when my housework isn’t done. I’m learning  that housework is never done and how important it is for me to spend quality time with each of my children. I don’t know why I struggle so much with the desire to keep busy. I need to learn that it’s o.k. if there are sticky fingerprints all over our front door and cheerios on the floor. Last night my 9 year old daughter asked if me and her could have our “girls night”. (Girls night is when me and my daughter spend an hour or so just talking or doing something fun, just the two of us.)I told her I had to much to do and that I didn’t have time. What I was really telling her was that my housework was more important than spending time with her. I realize how quickly my children are growing up, but still find myself saying “not right now”, “maybe tomorrow”, “I don’t have the time”. Starting now with God’s help I am going to:

take that walk with my family in the cool of the evening,

play that scrabble game my daughter has been wanting me to play,

Read that book to my children,

Decorate those fall cookies with my kids and not worry about the mess.

I’m going to spend my time on things that really matter- building memories with my children and enjoying God’s many blessings. Housework can wait because... I don't have the time, I'm busy making memories.

Television and Ungodly Influences in the Home

We would never purposely allow violence, pornographic magazines, vulgar language, or books in our home that teach evolution would we? Why is it that we don't see a problem with watching shows on t.v. in our homes that promote these same things? According to usetoday.com, the average American home has more televisions than people with an average of 3 televisions per home. As christians we shouldn't find entertainment in watching shows that promote a sinful lifestyle. Did we forget that it was SIN that nailed our Lord and Savior to the cross? Do we really think filling our minds with filth will have no consequences?
I'm not saying that it's wrong to ever watch television, but we need to use the Biblical standard for choosing which programs we watch:

Phillipians 4:8
"Finally brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or
praiseworthy-think about such things."

Proverbs 31:27
"Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life."


Galatians 5:19-21
Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

I want to share with you a few titles of some of the most popular t.v. shows of 2010:
True Blood
Lie to Me
Gossip Girl
Desperate Housewives
Hell's Kitchen
The Vampire Diaries
Pretty Little Liars
Charmed
Buffy the Vampire Slayers
Dirty Sexy Money
Sex and the City
Bad Girls Club
Californication



Here is just a few of the many dangers of television:

1. Desensitizes us to sin.
2. Corrupts our character. "garbage in, garbage out"
3. Creates a false view of reality.
4. Wastes time we can be spending doing something fruitful.
5. Steals precious time we can be spending with our family.
6. Is linked to a higer risk of autism in children.

The following paragraph is taken from Nancy Leigh DeMoss from Revive Our Hearts
Children will cultivate an appetite for whatever they are fed in their earliest formative years. I have known young people from 'committed' Christian homes who know more about movie stars and rock groups than they do about the patriarchs or the disciples. They can sing along with all the top hit songs but do not know the great hymns of the faith. I can only assume that they have an appetite for what they've been exposed to.
"If we allow our children to listen to music, attend movies, read books and magazines and hang out with friends that promote profanity, negative attitudes, illicit sex, rebellion, and violence, we should not be surprised when they adopt the world's philosophies."
God intended that our homes should be like a greenhouse--a potting place for young, tender plants, where they can be nurtured and brought up in the ways of God until they're prepared to go out into the world and to withstand the attacks and the storms of life outside your home.
As parents we need to be careful what influences we are allowing in our homes. May our homes and the programs we watch glorify the Lord and be pleasing in His sight.


The TV is my shepherd, my spiritual life shall want,
It makes me to sit down and do nothing for the cause of Christ.
It demandeth my spare time.
It restoreth my desire for the things of the world.
It keepeth me from studying the truth of God’s Word.
It leadeth me in the path of failure to attend God’s house.
Yea, though I live to be a hundred, I will fear no rental;
My “Telly” is with me, its sound and vision comfort me.
It prepareth a program for me, even in the presence of visitors.
Its volume shall be full.
Surely comedy and commercials shall follow me all the days of my life,
And I will dwell in spiritual poverty forever.
Author Unknown

Super Mom vs. Abiding Mom

Found this online without a name so I dont know who to give credit to, but felt it was worth sharing.


Does
Is (Psalm 46:10)

Tries to impress others
Pleases the Lord (Eph. 5:10, Proverbs 29:25)

Is controlled by an agenda (curriculum, schedule, etc)
Is controlled by the Holy Spirit: (Gal. 5:22-26) (Uses curriculum & schedules as tools for orderliness so she's more free to follow the spirit)

Her self worth is found in her accomplishments (clean house, perfect kids, the perfect bulletin boards, etc.)
Her self worth is found in an accurate view of who she is in Christ Jesus (Eph 2:10)

Her peace is found in the “perfect” environment
Her peace is found in Jesus in the midst of any storm (Is 26:3)

She is discouraged by failure
Failure reminds her that God's strength is made perfect in weakness (2 Cor. 12:9-10)

She expects perfection from herself and others
She practices grace with herself and others (Eph 4:32)

She teaches her kids to be good
She teaches her kids to be Godly (Proverbs 22:6)

She is frustrated with her lack of spiritual fruit
She abides in Christ and bears much fruit (John 15:5)

She does things with her children
She builds a relationship with her children (Deut 6:6-7)

Her perspective is based on what is seen
Her perspective is based on what is unseen (Col 3:2)

She chooses quantity of activities
She chooses the most excellent Way (I Cor 13)

Time Wasters

Have you ever found yourself wishing there were more hours in the day? The responsibilities we have as a wife and mother can often feel overwhelming; especially if we’re not using our time wisely. I know I am definitely guilty of this. We live in a day and age where there is countless distractions that can easily woo us and steal our time and energy away from what really matters. Time is a gift. We only have one life to live and every second, every breath should count. If you are finding yourself overwhelmed because you’re not able to keep up with the everyday demands of being a wife and mother ask God to show you the “time wasters” you have in your life that you need to weed out to make time for what really matters. Some time wasters that I have found in my own life is spending to much time on the computer (checking email, facebook, twitter), talking on the phone, reading books, saying “yes” to projects that I should really be saying “no” to, watching t.v., and sometimes just the act of being to busy. God never told us to be busy, but to be fruitful. I have learned that just because my phone rings doesn’t mean that I have to answer it. I have caller id so I can easily go over who called at a later time. Sometimes time wasters can be disguised as something good, but not be good in the particular season of your life. I remember spending a lot of my time reading christian books. Although there is nothing wrong with reading christian books, I was neglecting my housework, cooking meals for my family, and spending quality time with my husband. If we are neglecting the needs of ourselves, our families, or others then we need to carefully consider how we are spending each hour of our days. Don’t let the world ever fool you into thinking that motherhood isn’t a sacred calling that we should take seriously. Caring for the needs of our family is never a waste of time. We will all be held responsible before God how we nurtured our children and loved our husbands. How we spend our time should be an investment. Time spent living for self is time wasted.
Time spent living to glorify God, loving and serving others reaps eternal rewards. Ask God to help you discern the season of life that you are in and how you can weed out the time wasters that steal the gift of time.