If You Doubt Your Salvation

 There used to be a time when the enemy would cause me to doubt my salvation. One month I’d feel saved and the next I wasn’t quite sure. 

It wasn’t until I truly understood with my heart that it wasn’t about my performance that I felt true peace and rest. It wasn’t about how many Bible studies I did, how many times I witnessed to others, or how “good” I could be. 

One year ago I was pretty much unable mentally and physically to do anything. It wasn’t until I went completely off my medicine that I came out of that nightmare. (Not advocating any of you do this without much prayer and a trusted doctor!!) My only goal for each day was to keep the kids fed and alive. That’s it. No kidding. 

The once highly motivated me that loved doing things for others was now the one in need of constant help and prayer. 

It was through this experience that God reminded me that salvation was not dependent on my works. Yes, works will be evident in those who are truly born again, but there are seasons that it seems we are completely barren and fruitless, that no good thing can come from us again, or maybe that’s just how I felt. Depression, clouds of grief, despair, hopelessness, chronic health issues that won’t leave, with no end in sight- at least in this life. 

What then? 

When we can no longer lift burdens for others because we can’t even begin to see past our own, or even lift our head from the pillow.  

Are we still secure in our relationship with Jesus? “How could God love someone so useless and needy”,  says the father of lies, the devil. 

Let me assure you, no season we go through, no matter how ugly and terrible it seems at the time  is wasted and worthless to God! 

He is in ALL of it! You have to come to the point in your life that you give up fighting for the life you expected to have and embrace the life God has given you now, knowing He has a purpose and that the hard roads are the ones that lead to our eternal home. 

You have to make the choice in your heart, even when the thoughts in your mind  doesn’t want to cooperate, to believe God’s Word is Truth and the ultimate authority. Search the scriptures to put your negative thinking on trial and fight with the sword of the Lord- the Word of God. Without knowing and believing God’s Word we will be defeated by satan. 

Hard times are what God often uses to put to death what’s left of our flesh that tries to find satisfaction in this temporary, fallen world. Often in these times we lose some friends or family, but we gain an intimacy with Christ in our sufferings that few will have the privilege of knowing. 

As Christians we are invited to share in the sufferings of Christ. Often we suffer because of our own sin and poor choices, but many times we suffer because we live in a fallen world and are at war with an enemy who seeks to steal, kill, and destroy our hope and ultimately our soul. 

 No good deed or effort on my part could bring me one step closer to a Holy and Righteous God. Nothing. It had to be mercy. It had to be Grace. It had to be Him. Jesus pursuing me because He loves me, even when I couldn’t love myself. 

This week Luke 24, verses 16, 31, and 45 stood out to me. 

...But God kept them from recognizing Him.

...suddenly their eyes were opened and they recognized Him.

...Then He opened their minds to understand the Scriptures.

Without the enabling of the Holy Spirit we are unable to understand our need for a Savior. Two of Jesus’ disciples even walked and talked with Him and still didn’t even recognize Him because God kept them from it. 

I believe God gives knowledge and understanding to those who fear Him (reverence Him), and desire to truly honor Him. Only the Lord can open the eyes of the blind and set the captives free. 

Before I was born again I had no desire to please or honor Jesus. I had no desire to even seek Him. But after He changed my heart I have a desire to seek Him, to know Him, to please Him. 

I often fail in many ways, but the difference is that I am quickly convicted and hate it when I act in the flesh and grieve the Holy Spirit. Without the Holy Spirit not one of us would ever have the slightest desire to repent or seek Him. When one truly grasps that, it’s impossible not to love Him, to desire to honor and obey Him, no longer out of fear of punishment, but out of love for the Savior and what He does to rescue us from the Kingdom of darkness. 

Anything good that ever comes from me or you is only because of Jesus. When we remember this, there is no longer room for pride, a critical, judgmental attitude, bitterness, or unforgiveness. It’s only when we subconsciously believe any good dwells in us apart from Christ that we begin to be hard on others. 

If you are still able to find joy in sin and take advantage of His mercy day after day without remorse, can I encourage you to pray for the Lord to open your eyes, to cause you to see Him? 

To really see Him for the loving, merciful, long suffering Savior He is.  Cause once your eyes and heart are enlightened by the Holy Spirit you will no longer have the desire to be friends with the world.

 To love the spirit of this world is to hate Christ. You can go to church, tithe, teach Sunday school and give all your time and money to the poor and needy, but it amounts to nothing unless you have an intimacy with Christ through a consistent prayer life and make time to behold Christ. 

For it’s through beholding Christ that we are transformed to His Image. 

Any service we do should flow from the intimacy with spend with Him. No relationship could thrive if the spouse spent every waking hour working for the other, but never spent quality time with their spouse.  

But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord.” 2 Corinthians 3:18

If God could carry me through to the other side of what I was battling, He can do the same for you. No situation is hopeless and His grace truly is sufficient. 

If any of you are secretly battling fear, anxiety, hopelessness over your current situation and need prayer and encouraging scriptures to help you through, feel free to send me a private message! You are not alone. 

Thank God when you feel sick when you speak ill of another, allow a lustful thought, or find entertainment in anything that glorifies sin. 

That is the Holy Spirit who desires to rescue you from those things. 

Those who can sin without remorse are to be most pitied. Their hearts are hard and lost and they don’t even know it. 

There are lost souls who need a messenger of hope and the Spirit is calling us to repent, believe the gospel, and share that message with others. If there is anyone reading this that feels alone, hopeless, and in need of support, please message me and I would be happy to pray for you and support you any way I can.

 I never thought I would be able to share this message of hope again because I felt so hopeless, so discouraged, and defeated. It’s ok if you’ve fallen. Just get back up and remember....

“The godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again. But one disaster is enough to overthrow the wicked.”

Proverbs 24:16

We Serve a BIG God!

<sup>Today in my daily Bible reading I read in Isaiah. Occassionaly, I like to see other wording in different translations. This translation is from The Message, which I usually don't read, but loved how they worded today's message and had to share! It reminds me that we serve a BIG God!! Whatever problem, besetting sin, trial, or tribulation you are facing- our God is bigger! Truly, with Christ- the God of the Universe- you can do ALL things! Hope everyone has a blessed week!


Isaiah 40:12-31
12-17</sup>Who has scooped up the ocean
in his two hands,
or measured the sky between his thumb and little finger,
Who has put all the earth's dirt in one of his baskets,
weighed each mountain and hill?
Who could ever have told God what to do
or taught him his business?
What expert would he have gone to for advice,
what school would he attend to learn justice?
What god do you suppose might have taught him what he knows,
showed him how things work?
Why, the nations are but a drop in a bucket,
a mere smudge on a window.
Watch him sweep up the islands
like so much dust off the floor!
There aren't enough trees in Lebanon
nor enough animals in those vast forests
to furnish adequate fuel and offerings for his worship.
All the nations add up to simply nothing before him—
less than nothing is more like it. A minus.
^18-20So who even comes close to being like God?
To whom or what can you compare him?
Some no-god idol? Ridiculous!
It's made in a workshop, cast in bronze,
Given a thin veneer of gold,
and draped with silver filigree.
Or, perhaps someone will select a fine wood—
olive wood, say—that won't rot,
Then hire a woodcarver to make a no-god,
giving special care to its base so it won't tip over! ^21-24Have you not been paying attention?
Have you not been listening?
Haven't you heard these stories all your life?
Don't you understand the foundation of all things?
God sits high above the round ball of earth.
The people look like mere ants.
He stretches out the skies like a canvas—
yes, like a tent canvas to live under.
He ignores what all the princes say and do.
The rulers of the earth count for nothing.
Princes and rulers don't amount to much.
Like seeds barely rooted, just sprouted,
They shrivel when God blows on them.
Like flecks of chaff, they're gone with the wind. ^25-26"So—who is like me?
Who holds a candle to me?" says The Holy.
Look at the night skies:
Who do you think made all this?
Who marches this army of stars out each night,
counts them off, calls each by name
—so magnificent! so powerful!—
and never overlooks a single one? ^27-31Why would you ever complain, O Jacob,
or, whine, Israel, saying,
"God has lost track of me.
He doesn't care what happens to me"?
Don't you know anything? Haven't you been listening?
God doesn't come and go. God lasts.
He's Creator of all you can see or imagine.
He doesn't get tired out, doesn't pause to catch his breath.
And he knows everything, inside and out.
He energizes those who get tired,
gives fresh strength to dropouts.
For even young people tire and drop out,
young folk in their prime stumble and fall.
But those who wait upon God get fresh strength.
They spread their wings and soar like eagles,
They run and don't get tired,
they walk and don't lag behind.

What Are You Cleaving to?

What are you cleaving to?

My favorite definition of the word cleave is to "follow hard after" or to "adhere to"; which makes me think of glue. In other words, what are you glued to? What do you pursue with all your heart?

Some cleave to their career, their idols, their past, but the christian cleaves to Christ. We realize that Christ is all we have, our only hope, our righteousness, our only refuge in the storm, and our Advocate in the Judgement to come.

Who, when he came , and had seen the grace of God, was glad , and exhorted them all, that with purpose of heart they would cleave unto the Lord. Acts 11:23 KJV

Thou shalt fear the LORD thy God; him shalt thou serve, and to him shalt thou cleave, and swear by his name. Deuteronomy 10:20 KJV

But take diligent heed to do the commandment and the law, which Moses the servant of the LORD charged you, to love the LORD your God, and to walk in all his ways, and to keep his commandments, and to cleave unto him, and to serve him with all your heart and with all your soul. Joshua 22:5


That thou mayest love the LORD thy God, and that thou mayest obey his voice, and that thou mayest cleave unto him: for he is thy life, and the length of thy days: that thou mayest dwell in the land which the LORD sware unto thy fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to give them. Deuteronomy 30:20 KJV

Ye shall walk after the LORD your God, and fear him, and keep his commandments, and obey his voice, and ye shall serve him, and cleave unto him. Deuteronomy 13:4 KJV

Definitions of "Cleave":

to cling, cleave, keep close
NASB Word Usage
cleaves (4), cling (14), clings (3), closely pursued (1), closer (1), clung (4), deeply attracted (1), fasten its grip (1), follow closely (1), held fast (1), hold (2), hold fast (2), holding fast (1), joined (2), joined together (1), overtake (1), overtook (5), pursued him closely (1), pursued them closely (1), remained steadfast (1), stay (1), stay close (1), stayed close (1), stick (1), stick together (1), stuck (2). NASB Concordance

abide fast, cleave fast together, follow close hard after, be joined together
A primitive root; properly, to impinge, i.e. Cling or adhere; figuratively, to catch by pursuit -- abide fast, cleave (fast together), follow close (hard after), be joined (together), keep (fast), overtake, pursue hard, stick, take. Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance


I wrote this poem late last night as I studied the significance of cleaving to the Lord.


Cleave to Christ

When those you love betray you and the enemy surrounds,
When your many imperfections are more than you can count.
Cleave to Christ.

When you start to feel discouraged and your loaded down with cares,
When you haven’t heard an answer from the hours spent in prayer.
Cleave to Christ.

When the narrow way is lonely and your faith begins to wane,
When others try to tell you that your faith has been in vain.
Cleave to Christ.

When the cross is hard to carry and it feels like you are failing,
When the warnings that you’ve shared looks like they are unavailing.
Cleave to Christ.

When the finish line to heaven is hard to keep in sight,
When the dawning of the morning is being hid by night.
Cling to Christ.

When the only song your singing is a mourning over sin,
And the anguish of lost souls has been a heaviness within.
Cleave to Christ.

When life’s final breath is taken and our pilgrimage complete,
And we’re passing through death’s valley onto the golden streets.
Cling to Christ.

Our only rest and refuge is Christ in Whom we cleave,
His promises uphold us if by faith we do believe.

His Grace is Sufficient

My Grace is sufficient for you. 2 Corinthians 12:9


No matter what you are going through- the loss of a loved one, failing health, financial struggles, depression, addictions, marriage problems... His GRACE is always sufficient. Most days it’s the “little things” in life that I need his Grace for such as making it through the day with little sleep, caring for 3 highly energetic children, submitting to my husbands leadership. There are some days that I feel I so overwhelmed, but I keep telling myself “His Grace is sufficient.” It’s amazing how those 4 words can make such a huge impact in my life. As soon as I speak Truth I feel a burden lifted, peace in the midst of chaos, as I remind myself that God is in control and His grace is enough. Whatever you are going through, God has a purpose.

“It is impossible to be holy apart from suffering. There is a redemptive fruit that cannot be produced in our lives apart from suffering.”
“True joy isn’t the absence of pain, but the presence of the Lord Jesus in the midst of the pain. Suffering is a pathway to sanctification, a doorway into greater intimacy with God”. Nancy Leigh DeMoss

Serving The Lord With Gladness

The title of my blog is “serving the Lord with gladness”. If I was honest with you I would have to admit that my service the past year has been more grumbling than gladness. Our family has spent most of the winter being sick. We’ve had several strains of the flu, strep throat, tonsilitis, bronchitis, sinus infections, colds, ear infections, and pink eye. I’ve never seen anything like it. This year I was also diagnosed with Grave’s Disease (overactive thyroid). I see an endocrinologist on the 30th of this month. I’m hoping I can get it taken care of quickly so I can have the energy to raise my 3 children. I’m not sure if God is trying to teach me a valuable lesson or if satan is trying to destroy our home and steal my joy.
I believe it’s probably both. I do know that God always works for the good of those who love Him who are called according to His purpose. I also know that my situation in life could always be worse, a lot worse. I could be suffering from an incurable disease, cancer, or death of a child or spouse. I am blessed beyond words; way more than I ever deserve. Needless to say, illness, a colicky baby, and a toddler who still doesn’t sleep through the night has really taken a toll on my life (sanity) this past year. I truly believe in the power of prayer so I have brought all my requests to God both BIG and small. I have seen God answer prayers of mine in the past that were HUGE so when God didn’t answer my “little” prayer to help my baby to sleep through the night I was a little confused. I would politely remind God that He parted the Red Sea and raised the dead so He could easily make my daughter a better sleeper. I know this may seem silly to pray a prayer about sleep, but I’m just not a very happy homemaker when I can’t manage to get a few hours of uninterrupted sleep. My daughter is now 13 months and has only slept through the night a handful of times. God has bigger plans for me than a good night’s sleep I guess and I trust Him. I believe that God is sovereign. He is in control of every circumstance, both big and small.
In the past I have gone years with the sun shining with no storms to make me want to run for shelter. But I think that’s just it. Storms make us want to run to shelter. Storms for the most part bring us closer to Christ. When my life is nothing but sunshine I sometimes start thinking that I’m doing a pretty good job raising my children and being a Godly wife. But this is pride and God hates pride. He loves us to much to ignore our pride. Almost always pride comes before a fall. Jesus Christ is the ONLY reason that anything good whatsoever comes from me. Without Him, I can try in my own strength to be “good”. I can do all the right things and appear to be a good mother, good wife, and fool myself into thinking I have it all together, but the storms will reveal our true character. Only through and in Christ can we endure storms and continue to have joy and peace. I don’t want to build my life on shifting sand, but on the solid Rock of Christ. A house built on sinking sand has no substance and will crumble as soon as the rain starts pouring down. I don’t want my joy and gladness to be based only on my circumstances because my circumstances will always change. Lord, you are my joy and my gladness. Help me to look to You instead of looking at the storms. Help me to listen to your voice and not the voice of the enemy. Help me to stand on your promises and not try to stand on my own two feet. As the lyrics of song below goes: Refine me Lord through the flames.


Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.


Proverbs 16:18
Pride goes before destruction,
a haughty spirit before a fall.





On Christ the Solid Rock lyrics:

My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus’ blood and righteousness.
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly trust in Jesus’ Name.

When darkness seems to hide His lovely face,
I rest on His unchanging grace.
In every high and stormy gale,
My anchor holds within the veil.

On Christ the solid Rock I stand,
All other ground is sinking sand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

His oath, His covenant, His blood,
Support me in the whelming flood.
When all around my soul gives way,
He then is all my Hope and Stay.

On Christ the solid Rock I stand,
All other ground is sinking sand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

When He shall come with trumpet sound,
Oh may I then in Him be found.
Dressed in His righteousness alone,
Faultless to stand before the throne.

On Christ the solid Rock I stand,
All other ground is sinking sand;
All other ground is sinking sand.
On Christ the solid Rock I stand,
All other ground is sinking sand;
All other ground is sinking sand.





The Desert Song
By: Hillsong

This is my prayer in the desert
And all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in the hunger in me
My God is a God who provides

Verse 2:
And this is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved
Of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flames

Chorus:
And I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon forged against me shall remain

I will rejoice
I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

Verse 3:
And this is my prayer in the battle
And triumph is still on it's way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I'll stand

Bridge:
All of my life
In every season
You are still God
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

Verse 4:
This is my prayer in the harvest
When favor and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be emptied again
The seed I've received I will sow