Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Are You Task Driven or Relationship Driven?

Lately I have noticed that I tend to be more task driven rather than relationship driven.   I have unmeaningly valued accomplishing tasks, rather than engaging in one on one relationships with my children and my husband. 
I am an introvert and being task driven is usually my default. At the end of the day, it's nice to think of all the tasks that I have accomplished and see visual evidence/fruit of my labor.  We often feel the more we do, the more productive our day has been. We like to see quick results from our labor. The clean closets, the empty laundry baskets, the sparkling windows, the shiny, clean floors. We could clean 24/7 and there would still be something left to do.  If we're not careful we can become only task oriented and neglect building relationships with those around us.

You might be to task oriented if you...

feel like you are never able to rest until you have the perfect environment.
are lacking joy and you're always in a hurry.
make promises to your children and don't fulfill them.
are always saying phrases like, "in a little while", "when I get this done", "maybe later", but later never comes.
often find it difficult to be still while you are praying or reading God's Word.
feel like you are wasting time if you take the time to do nothing, except to enjoy your surroundings.
live life like you are on a time schedule and resent interuptions.
are led by impulse, rather than God's Spirit.

If we are too busy each day to read God's Word, to pray, to laugh, make memories, and enjoy life with our children, then we are too task driven.

Better is a handful of quietness than two hands full of toil and a striving after wind.
Ecclesiastes 4:6 ESV

 I don't want to live life striving after the wind.

I want my children's soul to be nurtured and their heart to be fed.
I want to sit around the dinner table without thinking about the dishes that need done.
I want to play a game of Scattegories without thinking I could be doing something better or getting things done around the house.
I want to be like Mary who was able to forget about the work that needed to be done and just sit at the feet of Jesus.   
I want to be Jesus driven, not task driven.
I want relationships to be top priority.

If you feel overwhelmed and the joy you once had in homemaking is gone, perhaps you are being task driven and not relationship driven. The Lord isn't a harsh taskmasker. His ways are not burdensome, but light.
Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”
Matthew 11:28-30

Next time your child asks you to do a coloring contest, go for a walk, or to just sit and visit; look them in the eye and say with all your heart, "I'd love too!" Just watch the smile you'll receive and know that you've chosen what matters most- relationships.

1 comment:

  1. I am definitely task driving as well. I have to be very intentional about cultivating my relationships. Thanks for the reminder!



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